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Metro Bodies

Metro’s body issue is in stands now and features this year an athlete, a rockstar, an intellectual, a boy next door & a hunk. Check out our own local male hotties:

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TOP 10: Rules for understanding the typical, tiny male brain.

Pardon the title, I got it from an article on the latest issue of Metro that I found rather amusing. And funny. It’s under the Metro man section and is called What every girl should know by Chris Cruz. I may not fit the typical guy role but I have to admit these things are quite true. Here’s the ten Guy Rules that caught my attention and made my day.

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10. The Faltermeyer Beer Scale: During the office Christmas party, a man and a woman who was formerly just a photocopier down on the fifth floor or the boss’ personal secretary can have wild, mind-blowing sex as long as they were both drunk beyond all sanity. Simply put, the more beers a man has to consume in order to get it on, the less appealing the female is.

9. If it feels itchy, it will be scratched. Men do that. Women have poise, men have porpoise, erm, purpose. That’s why men sit with spread legs and make adjustments to their waterworks when it gets uncomfortable.

8. Men believe that “Yes”, “No” and “I’m fine” are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. Men say what they mean most of the time. Women shouldn’t try to overanalyze the nuances and inflections of it.

7. Just as dogs and cows are colorblind, all men see in only 16 colors, just like old Windows default settings. To a man, red, green and blue are colors. Mango, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Periwinkle sounds naughty and British.

6. Men do not ask for directions. A man admitting he is lost is like being a Korean tourist in Swaziland. We don’t like showing weakness. If a woman is present, she should ask directions from the security guard while the man stands there with furrowed brows, trying to figure out what direction to go while holding on to what little shreds of dignity he still possesses.

5. Anything a man said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after seven days. Men have short memories about these things, because the male brain is filled with vastly more important things such as basketball scores, PS3 cheat codes and quotes from Bruce Campbell’s Army of Darkness.

4. Most guys feel helpless when a woman brings on the tears. Men can change a tire, fix a leaky faucet, or defrag a hard disk. Guys cannot figure out how to make women stop crying. Men will just stand there looking like idiots and they don’t like that.

3. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing (both urinating, both waiting in line, etc.) For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod or eyebrow lift is enough (winking is not okay). Ideally, a man chooses a urinal at least one space away from another urinating man. If circumstances force two men to urinate beside each other, they must ignore each other completely unless one guy is watering the other guy’s shoe with Mountain Dew.

2. Men don’t kiss other men. It’s acceptable only in a moment of weakness such as in Lord of the Rings, when Aragorn gave Boromir a wet, hairy one before heading to that big Ramones concert in the sky. Beso-beso is a big effin’ no-no.

And the top Guy Rule out there that ladies should know?

1. Men may cry in the following circumstances: 30 seconds after agreeing to watch Brokeback Mountain with a hot date, wrapping their dad’s car around a lamppost, the instant Megan Fox unhooks her bra.

So what do you think? Agree? Hehe… 😀

What’s New?

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Bride Wars

Two of my most favorite actresses join forces to deliver a romantic comedy entitled Bride Wars directed by Gary Winick (13 Going On 30). Kate Hudson (How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days) and Anne Hathaway (The Devil Wears Prada) play two best friends, Liv and Emma that became rivals having set both their weddings on the same day. Catch? One MUST give way. This ought to be fun! Make sure its the first thing you catch for 2009!

 

Cover Wars

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First up, yes, Ms. Aniston herself sporting a tie and nothing else. OMG, she is gorgeous! As in major, hot if I may say. She already made a hot cover for GQ before but this one definitely tops that. S-E-X-Y. Can’t believe Brad left her, well, Angelina is hot too. So I can’t blame him. John Mayer is a lucky guy!

piolo_metro

This one I have to get a copy myself, as I always do hehe. =) It’s the annual body issue of Metro Magazine. Their December-January special edition is always the most anticipated issue every year probably the best selling too. This year with Piolo Pascual and his six-pack on the cover, no wonder they’re sold out.

 

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Best of Hilary Duff

It’s her 2nd greatest hits record released this November 11 in the US, the first one being Most Wanted which became her 2nd no. 1 album after Metamorphosis. I don’t know actually why she did it again since the 2 almost have the same songs except of course the songs that came out later off her Dignity album. In her defense though, she doesn’t call it her greatest hits just a compilation album. I love the cover she’s so grown up and very sultry looking. The record is released with a new single called Reach Out, just watched the video and she’s beautiful and doing the whole sexy thing again. I have to have this one, since I didn’t got the first. Hope its released here too. Here’s the tracklisting:

1. Reach Out

2. Holiday

3. Stranger

4. With Love

5. Play With Fire

6. Wake Up

7. Fly

8. Come Clean

9. So Yesterday

10. Why Not

11. Reach Out (Remix)

12. Holiday (Remix)

I just wished she included Beat Of My Heart and Our Lips Are Sealed with her sister Haylie.

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