TOP 10: Rules for understanding the typical, tiny male brain.

Pardon the title, I got it from an article on the latest issue of Metro that I found rather amusing. And funny. It’s under the Metro man section and is called What every girl should know by Chris Cruz. I may not fit the typical guy role but I have to admit these things are quite true. Here’s the ten Guy Rules that caught my attention and made my day.

10. The Faltermeyer Beer Scale: During the office Christmas party, a man and a woman who was formerly just a photocopier down on the fifth floor or the boss’ personal secretary can have wild, mind-blowing sex as long as they were both drunk beyond all sanity. Simply put, the more beers a man has to consume in order to get it on, the less appealing the female is.

9. If it feels itchy, it will be scratched. Men do that. Women have poise, men have porpoise, erm, purpose. That’s why men sit with spread legs and make adjustments to their waterworks when it gets uncomfortable.

8. Men believe that “Yes”, “No” and “I’m fine” are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. Men say what they mean most of the time. Women shouldn’t try to overanalyze the nuances and inflections of it.

7. Just as dogs and cows are colorblind, all men see in only 16 colors, just like old Windows default settings. To a man, red, green and blue are colors. Mango, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Periwinkle sounds naughty and British.

6. Men do not ask for directions. A man admitting he is lost is like being a Korean tourist in Swaziland. We don’t like showing weakness. If a woman is present, she should ask directions from the security guard while the man stands there with furrowed brows, trying to figure out what direction to go while holding on to what little shreds of dignity he still possesses.

5. Anything a man said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after seven days. Men have short memories about these things, because the male brain is filled with vastly more important things such as basketball scores, PS3 cheat codes and quotes from Bruce Campbell’s Army of Darkness.

4. Most guys feel helpless when a woman brings on the tears. Men can change a tire, fix a leaky faucet, or defrag a hard disk. Guys cannot figure out how to make women stop crying. Men will just stand there looking like idiots and they don’t like that.

3. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing (both urinating, both waiting in line, etc.) For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod or eyebrow lift is enough (winking is not okay). Ideally, a man chooses a urinal at least one space away from another urinating man. If circumstances force two men to urinate beside each other, they must ignore each other completely unless one guy is watering the other guy’s shoe with Mountain Dew.

2. Men don’t kiss other men. It’s acceptable only in a moment of weakness such as in Lord of the Rings, when Aragorn gave Boromir a wet, hairy one before heading to that big Ramones concert in the sky. Beso-beso is a big effin’ no-no.

And the top Guy Rule out there that ladies should know?

1. Men may cry in the following circumstances: 30 seconds after agreeing to watch Brokeback Mountain with a hot date, wrapping their dad’s car around a lamppost, the instant Megan Fox unhooks her bra.

So what do you think? Agree? Hehe…

Someone’s been claiming my mobile no.!!!

And that someone is a disc jockey which goes by the name of DJ Mae. I don’t know any DJ Mae from any radio station but then again I’m not sure. I’m thinking it’s a provincial station since the texter/s uses some dialect I can’t understand. Okay, it all started around late this year – I can’t remember the exact time. This texter keeps sending me messages and calling me DJ Mae and keeps requesting for songs or sending shoutouts. At first, I didn’t mind maybe that person just wrong-sent the messages. But then it kept on going on every now and then and this time it’s not just one, there are other texters too. Not sure how many since I don’t recognize their phone nos. and I have no intention to. So I did what I have to as much as I wanna ignore them and not spend a single peso. I texted one of them, I texted him/her (I think her) and I said in all frankness and irritation that I’m not DJ Mae, I don’t know any DJ Mae so stop texting. And then she replied which goes something like this: “Sori ha. May no. ka ba ni DJ Mae? Ano name mo? Puede makipag-textmate?”. Aaaarggghhh!!!! The nerve! Didn’t I just said that I’m in no way related to this person? And here she is asking if I know the DJ’s no. and wanting to be my texmate. So I lost it and replied, implying the exact same thing. And then she texted again saying that I’m so rude and she was just asking. But I don’t care, do I look like someone who cares??? I’m glad the message got through and she got the point.

So it’s all good. I’m minding my own business now. And then it started coming in again. And he/she (a different one) started calling too. This time I’m referred to as Ate Rose asking for someone’s mobile no.. My gosh where do they get my freakin’ cellphone no.??!! Actually, there were a few others in separate instances and different scenarios before. So I decided – yet again just now, to text back and say that my name is not Ate Rose in an almost mean kind of way so that he/she won’t bother me again. This time I remembered to ask where the texter got my no., and it’s confirmed. He/she claimed they got it from the radio. So does this mean this Ate Rose is a DJ too? And of course the texter labeled me as a hateful person and even said that I should change since it’s almost the eve of new year’s day. I don’t mind at all as long as they won’t fill my inbox with stupid messages. What’s wrong with these DJs? And what’s their deal for crying out loud?!!! Are they announcing some freakin’ random cellphone no. on air so that listeners won’t keep bugging them? That’s what’s going on – I think. Unless, this DJs have some hidden grudge on me. I don’t remember any misdemeanor I did involving any DJ. I’m really thinking of changing my no., but it’s so hassle. It sucks switching nos. since you have to text all your contacts -the ones you want to know at least. Can someone tell me who this DJs are or if you recognize them? Coz’ I don’t wanna waste time finding out who they are. Is there any way I can stop this, some regulation or law even? I’m guessing none. So I’m stuck in this stupid situation. Hmmpp! I’m really pissed off! Happy New Year to me!

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Geek alert! The kid in me is going out again. I just watched the trailer for the Wolverine spin-off of the X-Men movies, and I can tell it’s going to be kickass! (Watch it in full HD glory.) Although we have to wait until May 1st, 2009 to catch it in theaters, I’m pretty hyped already. I’m a big fan of Marvel especially the X-Men and in my opinion it’s the best superhero franchise. From comic books, animated series to movies. Hands down they’re my favorite superheroes. Heck, as a kid I wished I was one of them. And up to now, I still have an inkling one day I’d discover my hidden super abilities.

In the trailer, I’ve already recognized some of the characters, aside from Wolverine of course. I’ve seen Gambit, happy about this one I was bummed he didn’t make it in the first three films, the Blob and Sabretooth, also happy they didn’t make him look like the too-literal version in the 1st movie. This movie is alot darker and brutal, I guess they were staying away from the cornball take on the 1st X-Men. Looking back, that movie really does suck. I think one of the very few characters they did justice on was Mystique. Of course at that time the movie was so awesome as we were all excited that they adopted it into a full-length movie not until the sequels came out. It started picking up on the 2nd installment but it wasn’t until The Last Stand that they blew me away. Aside from the ‘kill-all-the-main-characters’ plot every bit was awesome. Anyways, as you may have heard they’re basically focusing on Wolverine, kind of a duh?-moment when in fact the X-Men movies were already about him. It’s like 50% is on Wolverine and the other half is shared by the rest of the characters! I mean Wolverine is an integral part of X-Men and I think his story really is one of the more interesting scripts in the franchise but I still didn’t get why they had to create a spin-off. But it’s done and I hope they made the right decision.

The movie is considered as a prequel and is set roughly 20 years before X-Men amidst the violent past of Wolverine, his early encounters with the very human and anti-mutant William Stryker and focuses on the popular Weapon X project, wherein the government experiments on mutants willing and unwilling to enhance their powers and turn them into living weapons. It was during this time Wolverine was part of a CIA black ops team called Team X made up by the other mutants in the movie like Deadpool played by Ryan Reynolds (Van Wilder), Agent Zero also known as Maverick played by Daniel Henney (yup the Korean superstar), Silver Fox (Wolverine’s love interest), Kestrel played by Will.I.Am (B.E.P.) and the rest mentioned above. Numerous cameos are present as well both from new and old characters such as Emma Frost or more popularly known as the White Queen, Banshee and the young Cyclops, Storm, Jayson Stryker (William’s mutant son) and probably even the X-Men creator Stan Lee as he always does. What will he play this time around? I have to admit I don’t know much of most of the characters but I’ve heard of them or encountered them on the comics. On another note, I heard they’re making a Magneto version of X-Men Origins too. That would be great since he’s one of my favorite characters.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine stars and is led by Wolverine himself, Mr. Hugh Jackman (I couldn’t think of anyone who better fits the role) and is directed by Mr. Gavin Hood (Rendition – 2007).

MTV pulls the plug on TRL.

 

Total Request Live or more famously known as TRL had their final show last November 16, 2008 in where else but NY Times Square of course. The show entitled ‘TRL Total Finale Live’ showcased their countless top moments and highlights throughout its decade run on MTV. Tons of stars made special appearances on the show, from staples such as Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez, Korn, Hilary Duff, Christina Aguilera, Eminem, Good Charlotte, Diddy to currently budding stars such as Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift. And of course what’s TRL without live performances? For the last time on the TRL stage are Fallout Boy, the Backstreet Boys singing I Want It That Way (less Kevin), Beyonce opened the show, while Ludacris, Nelly and Snoop Dogg did a medley, 50 Cent performed as well and others I can’t remember.

The VJs didn’t miss out who had moments of themselves as well, topbilled by Carson Daly (the longest and most popular host), then you have Hilarie Burton (One Tree Hill), Damien Fahey, Quddus, Lala, Susie and Vanessa Minnillo and from MTV News: Suchin Pak, John Norris and Sway. The show featured their top live performances since September 1998 when they first aired, guest stars and VJs which by the way does not only include entertainers from the music industry but movies, sports and pretty much everyone in the ‘biz. Again, what’s TRL without the top 10 videos, for this last time their counting down the top 10 most iconic and influential videos of all time:

1. …Baby One More Time – Britney Spears - 1998

2. The Real Slim Shady – Eminem – 2000

3. I Want It That Way – Backstreet Boys – 1999

4. Bye Bye Bye – ‘N Sync – 2000

5. Dirrty – Christina Aguilera – 2002

6. Bawitdaba – Kid Rock – 1999

7. Crazy In Love – Beyonce ft. Jay-Z – 2003

8. Yeah! – Usher ft. Ludacris and Lil’ Jon – 2004

9. What’s My Age Again – Blink-182 – 1999

10. Hey Ya! – Outkast – 2003

It’s the end of an era; it’s bittersweet as one of the VJs said. TRL, said Justin, is an integral part of their careers. Some of the biggest artists in the world jumpstarted theirs’ on this show. Name it. Best example is Britney (a no-show surprisingly) who premiered and arrived at the scene the same time as TRL and probably even popularized TRL itself. It is the best platform for new artists wanting to make it big. Not only because the show is basically run by the votes of fans, audiences and viewers but the fact that the artists can perform and interact with them live is what makes it special. I’m one of the fans of the show surpised by this turnout. I didn’t even heard about this, not til’ I stumbled upon it on MTV (currently watching right now.) I’m gonna miss the ever-surprising lineup of guests, the countdown of the top 10 videos and guessing what’s on no. 1, and the rockin’ live performances. I’d miss it when the stars go to the windows and stare and wave at their fans frenzied and blocking the streets of New York, their photobooth pics and the signature wall of everyone who ever set foot on the TRL set. I don’t know why they’d have to end it. TRL is one of the few good shows left on MTV. Now, it’s pretty much filled with crappy so-called “reality” shows. Well, TRL will be replaced by another show of the same format called FNMTV (Friday Night MTV/Feedback New MTV) hosted by Pete Wentz (Fallout Boy/Mr. Ashlee Simpson).

High marks for ‘Low Key’

I know it’s very seldom for someone to actually take time and read my blog, so how can I refuse when they request for something, right? So here it is, consider me your own personal genie. Your wish is my command. I guess I’m open for business, hehe . You, yes you, can tell me what I post or what I need to improve. Just leave a comment and I’ll gladly read them. No haters though! You can criticize me but there’s a fine line to just being obnoxious.

As per request, for Athan I hope you like it.

Low Key – Regine Velasquez

01 Tell me that you love me
02 And I love you so
03 I’d rather leave while i’m in love
04 I never dreamed someone like u could love someone like me
05 No walls, no ceiling, no floors
06 Good friend
07 How can I tell you
08 Of all the things
09 Longer

10 At seventeen
11 She’s always a woman
12 Never be the same
13 Strawberry fields forever
14 Weeping willows, cattails
15 Leader of the band
16 Walk in love
17 Clouds across the moon
18 Christmas is Feat. Jim Brickman

Asia’s Songbird came out this November with a brand new album called ‘Low Key’ appropriately termed as you will barely hear her belt out throughout the record. As she said so herself: “I discover new things about myself and use them in my songs. I realized that the voice doesn’t have to be loud to be forceful, and that a performer can convey a wide range of emotions even in soft or gentle singing.” It’s quite refreshing actually, with an angelic voice like hers I do think she doesn’t have to make an effort to flaunt. It’s been proven by the test of time. Although, I have to admit I’m one of those that get all excited whenever she reaches those very high notes. Did I mention, high? She has one of the most beautiful voices around.

Going back to the album, although these are covers (again) of old songs it was still good. When asked why she haven’t released an all-originals album she said: “People like to hear something that they are already familiar with. So for me, I wanted to give our audience what they want. Plus, I happen to like all the songs. It’s an opportunity for me to do this also because these are the songs I used to listen to the radio, and wishing that one day, I’ll be able to have my own version. It has come true. ” You have to give it to her, I mean, not everybody can pull of remakes and give it their own personal touch. Not everyone can ‘resurrect’ them. You don’t just remake any song, it has to be of relevance or deep meaning. I have to admit, I don’t know any of the songs, huhu… Just the 11th track. But it didn’t stop me from listening. Go to Tonet’s Daily.com to see for yourselves, or rather hear. For a moment there, I thought it was Cacai in the album cover with her short hair. But I liked it, I like her best in short hair.

On the sidetracks, heard the Divas 4 Divas concert topbilled by her, Zsa-Zsa, Pops and Kuh was a smash. There’s only a few times wherein these entertainers do get together and perform. It must’ve been an event to remember. Congrats to her, to them!